A few years ago I was just a young woman, fresh out of the university and ‘’hungry’’ for life. In fact, I was just 22 then and had so much potential and still do. My life was just ‘’mine’’ and I could literally breeze in and out when I choose to with no limitation. I was no more under the instruction of my parent; in plain words, I did not need permission to move. Those were the days when I had my boyfriend (now husband) and we were literally just continuing the fun we had in school, my life was just about me, my job and my boyfriend.
I remember our usual month ending treats especially when our meagre National Service allowances were paid. We would shop, eat at the best restaurants and go places. After all, we were being housed, we didn’t have to bother about food, rent, utility bills, school fees, transportation and the likes, I vividly remember we would tell ourselves we earned our income and so we had to ‘’enjoy’’ our labor, By the time we were done “chilling” we would have spent half of our income and the rest were just for our personal savings till another pay day and this cycle continued for about a year. For me, I was being housed, fed and transported even to my national service job and I had no cares at all, none whatsoever !!
Then the time was right to make our union legal before God and our families and friends, the life of newlyweds are truly magical; expensive eating out, staying up all-night to chat, washing as and when we wanted, going on movie dates, cooking and cleaning together sometimes, life couldn’t be better and for personal reasons we delayed childbirth until we were very ready, In fact, we waited for two solid years and both families were beginning to look at us ‘’strangely’’ if only they knew we were the least bothered.
After two years, I was very ready physically, mentally and we were financially ready (you can never be fully ready) to have children. Our son arrived not long after and SUDDENDLY our lives changed forever. Here is this miniature human being, so lovely yet came with so much work!
The chores that came with him were too much and thank God for grandparents and the extended family who were ever ready to support and teach me a few ‘’tricks’’ of the game. I guess I did a good job and still doing so. One day I woke up and I do not just one or two but three kids to raise.
My life is literally at a pause!; 24 hours is not enough for me again, my daily schedules have become mundane, overwhelming school runs, three or four home works per child (eii teachers can be mean…..), feeding time is ‘’war’’ and as for bathing and brushing of teeth, you need to be in my home to witness the spectacle and the ‘’most painful’’ part is the dreaded phrase; it’s time to sleep. And oh there is nappy changing and breastfeeding, backing the number 3 alongside all these too.
My goodness, that is when someone wants to poop, followed by the famous I will drink water lines and incessant crying for no reason! Ah just go to sleep, how I wish for this with all the sleep arrears I have. Eventually, my kids sleep at not later than 7.30pm amidst all the protests. Finally the woman can relax but NO (onye nokwere da!), I have to now prepare for the next day; snacks for school, sign homeworks, clean the kitchen, eat dinner, prepare for work, finish off extra work from the office (this highly not recommended), watch TV if there is some ‘’small’’ time while dosing and eventually sleep at 9.30pm at the earliest.
I cannot just leave my home and go, (daabi da, onye possible…), if I have to all three miniatures will follow me. The thought of dressing each one and even packing all the extras just to go to Papas Pizza and etc. is enough stress not to go, I rather will stay in my house and enjoy ‘’peace’’, I simply cannot just go.
Folks don’t be worried if you don’t see me at the office party and Silver Bird where I used to go every Fridays. I am very much aware there is that comedy show at the Conference Centre and I can afford to buy the ticket and even a spare one for you but I simply won’t come.
You have not seen me in church for a while, I would love to be there. I really miss praise and worship time and the after church fufu stuff at bush canteen, when next you go there buy some for me. They have delivery service now. I am sure you are wondering where the MAN in all this is, I will let you know at another time, until then I am at home and simply cannot just go!!!